Everyone needs to be encouraged from time to time. Sometimes life isn’t easy, sometimes the journey we take through it can be overwhelming. But the realization that these hardships will pat must be understood.
I recently had to work through the emotion of not being good enough. When you are working on changing your life, your mind will sometimes remind you of past failures and disappointments. Sometimes it is a self defense mechanism, it is your mind’s way of keeping you from being hurt again. But more often than not, they are old thoughts and beliefs that come bubbling to the surface like some sort of a volcanic explosion of bad feelings.
If I were like most people, I would have agreed with those emotions and simply given up on what I was trying to accomplish. Many people allow the feelings of doubt, fear, and disbelief to rule their actions. This way to approach life isn’t bad, but if you’re trying to move from an area of your life that is not bringing you joy, then that direction will bring the same terrible and sad results you have always received. People who are moving toward and have achieved their success, know that this internal battle with yourself is almost a constant fight. One part of you wants to go for your goals, and the other part wants you to remain where you are. I found myself in the same situation, loosing my path and having no clue on how to return.
Perhaps this has happened to you, you have been working hard on a project or goal and then suddenly, as if out of nowhere, everything stops flowing. The ideas and pretty much the desire is gone. You sit day after day trying to bring back the drive, going through all the motions that brought you movement before, with no success. You begin to become frustrated, maybe I have done something wrong, or maybe the choices I made to achieve my dreams have ultimately led to this inevitable dead end. Then your frustration leads to anger, you begin to lash out at yourself and others around you for the lack of progression and motivation. You ask yourself, why did led to go this far, just to have everything fall part? Your friends and family begin to add to the crescendo of thoughts and voices that told your that you choice in this venture was a bad decision and you should have stayed where you were. You find yourself stagnant, motionless, and unable to move in any direction. You realize that you have been still so long and falling so far behind, that what is the use of trying to pick up your dreams and move again?
I could have gone two different directions at this point. One way is to completely give up, throw away all the progress I had made up until this point, and give into the feeling of depression of seeing my dream and not continuing to pursue it. Relinquishing my thoughts of success and replacing them with mediocrity while listening to others, who have no ambition of their own, tell me how my life should be.
The second option is to find and encourage myself, to remember the essence of my dreams and desires. I have come a long way from where I used to be. I have had people tell that my words have inspired them, have changed their life, and have opened their eyes to the possibilities of life. I have learned how to start a business and am continuing to learn new things. I refuse to let those who say that something that is impossible influence my life.
No, this change in mindset is not easy, it takes discipline and practice to break through old beliefs and habits. But, if you stick with it and give it 100%, it can happen for you. I wish to encourage as many people as possible to make this conscious decision to get back up and try again.
Ask For Help
This step in helping you forward seems simple, but for me it was difficult. Not being able to handle your own problems was a sign of weakness, so I would not ask for help until it was too late. This is a belief I had to practice and work through, and I believe this was part of some of my problems. Allowing others to help, lifts some of the burden and stress of trying to come with solutions by yourself. I also find that speaking the issue out loud often helps me find the answers.
No successful person has ever reached their achievement or dreams without the help of others. There has always been a co-worker, subordinate, or mentor who has helped me through some my toughest times, and I grateful to each and every one of them. Plus, how does it feel when someone asks you for help? I feel honored that they are coming to me for answers. You shouldn’t deny that feeling to someone else because you think you know all the answers or you are too proud, except help with gratitude.